tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post5120965401302801605..comments2024-01-24T05:26:00.039-08:00Comments on Whitterer on Autism: Mirror, mirror, on the wall - Beauty from withinMaddyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05828186178060722812noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-25491115098022129802007-07-18T20:42:00.000-07:002007-07-18T20:42:00.000-07:00Your kids seem sweet, inside and out;) I hate to t...Your kids seem sweet, inside and out;) I hate to think of someone speaking to them that way.burgiboogiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03409408452487415225noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-25699477602066079962007-07-18T17:00:00.000-07:002007-07-18T17:00:00.000-07:00I think I would be finding whoever taught him that...I think I would be finding whoever taught him that phrase and kicking some serious behind maternal-style myself were I you. People can be so insensitive. <BR/><BR/>If I may ask - how old are your daughters? My oldest - my son - turned 26 this past May (which still astonishes me!). You have probably written in your blog somewhere their ages but I thought it easier to ask rather than search. I know, I know - I'm lazy! <BR/><BR/>Also, thank you for your empathy on my post from last night. I am now overwhelmed at the amount of care and concern poured forth by so many dear people I have only "met" through blogging.Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05698969349369789642noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-19692533320375266482007-07-18T10:06:00.000-07:002007-07-18T10:06:00.000-07:00Inner beauty vs external appearance; "so smart" vs...Inner beauty vs external appearance; "so smart" vs "stupid" -oh boy! Cans and cans of worms that those things can open in anyone! I've been extremely self-conscious for most of my life because of my teeth -the upper front ones appeared to protrude. Would you believe, it wasn't till I got my lower denture plate and new uppers, that I realized (and so did the dentist, I think -LOL -lightbulb moments)that the maloclusion was actually the lower, not the upper jaw! But growing up, when the upper teeth began to protrude and I chipped on of them too, I frequently heard family members comparing my appearance to my Dad's one sister, whose upper teeth were crooked and protruding and how they would say "She would have been so pretty if her teeth were straight" and seeing mine were moving in the same direction it seemed as my aunts, I associated that with making me unattractive. No one ever said diddly about inner beauty back then. My older daughter has a lot of the same attributes except she is (unlike her mother) quite stunning in her appearance but the image she's always seen in the mirror is not the same thing apparently as you would see or I see there. I used to ask her if perhaps she needed my bifocals to see herself better since she wasn't seeing what I saw there. She had her jaw broken surgically, at age 21 and her mouth wired shut for 3 months to align her upper and lower jaws and correct for the lower maloclusion which did give her a little bit more self-confidence. (Her siblings and I have often referred to that three month wired-mouth period as the most peaceful time we ever spent with her! LOL) <BR/>How did you ever explain "suave" to your son anyway?Jenihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16425701332785470116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-36647927798403199282007-07-18T07:40:00.000-07:002007-07-18T07:40:00.000-07:00show me your soul insteadlovelyI might err on the ...<I>show me your soul instead</I><BR/>lovely<BR/>I might err on the side of motherly gushing to my boys about their outer beauty and their cleverness. I think I wanted to be told that more often growing up. (my poor Dad, has long forgotten this, I'm sure, but when I was 11, he told me I'd be pretty...like WonderWoman Lynda Carter, if I just lost 15 pounds. thanks Dad) People can be so cruel, and I want to build them up in case others would tell them otherwise. Not that i exaggerate. I just talk it up if I see it.Suzannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02732095611947394379noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-60588938703141521062007-07-18T06:51:00.000-07:002007-07-18T06:51:00.000-07:00"Oh how stupid you are being today!"Not his natura..."Oh how stupid you are being today!"<BR/><BR/>Not his natural speech pattern. You are right; someone said that to him. Someone needs to be hunted down.<BR/><BR/>This morning, I got to hear Arie repeatedly tell Éiden to shut up.<BR/><BR/>Guess who taught him that particular phrase? That's right. Me.Haddayrhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02538105167989517633noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-435853560753940602007-07-18T05:50:00.000-07:002007-07-18T05:50:00.000-07:00I've always told Ben he is beautiful. I think he ...I've always told Ben he is beautiful. I think he believes it!!!<BR/><BR/>I'll never forget the day Ben came home and asked me, "Mom, what is a 'retard' ?" <BR/><BR/>Talk about wanting to kick butt! Calling people names shows more about the insecurity of the caller than it does about the called. To hell with them...life's too short to bother with those kind of arseholes!<BR/><BR/>I know exactly what you mean about the echolalia, too. Those words have to come from somewhere, as our kids are great mimics!Usethebrains Godgiveyouhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05026223483117357541noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-86692070405666586182007-07-18T05:24:00.000-07:002007-07-18T05:24:00.000-07:00We find that our 'inside' is a hard subject to gra...We find that our 'inside' is a hard subject to grasp - the soul. We understand our inside is full of parts that work to make us work....but the inner beauty is beyond our ability at this point.<BR/><BR/>You are a handsome and sweet boy are good enough for Demetrius....without causing enough confusion to have both of us banging our heads on the wallJerry Grassohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07900836236599920524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37025305.post-64694571325828625512007-07-18T04:41:00.000-07:002007-07-18T04:41:00.000-07:00I get & approve of the whole inner-you beauty thin...I get & approve of the whole <I>inner-you</I> beauty thing, but I am always telling my kids how gorgeous they are because I figure if your own mother can't tell you you're beautiful / handsome etc, then who can?Stomper Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04038937073264645029noreply@blogger.com