Everyone's a critic

Snippets collected over a few days:-

"What are you doing Mother?"
Mother?
"Um...knitting dear."
"And what exactly are you knitting?"
"Socks.....for you."
"But it's Summer. You bought that wool ages ago and you're only getting around to it now, when it's nearly 80 degrees outside?"
"Well yes I do seem to have got a little behind."
"I'll say!"
"Never mind they'll do for next year."
"I don't know if I'll like that colour next year. I'll be a year older, more sophisticated, you know."

Don't bet on it dearie.

"Mommmmmm!"
"Yes dear?"
"Which you are like?"
"Um.....?"
"Dis card or dat card. Which one is be dah winner?"
"Um.....?"
"In dah battle."
"Er......?"
"Choose!"
"The red one."
"Huh! No, you lose I win."
"Good for you dear."
"I know coz you are always choose dah red."

I need to be less predictable.

"Are you tired dear?"
"No."
"You look sleepy. Wasn't that a yawn?"
"No.....it's just dat.....my eyelids are be heavy and my mouth......is been need oxygen."

You and me both dearie.

"Why are you phoning love?"
"Because I haven't spoken to you person to person for three days now."
"Two and a half."
"Pardon?"
"Thursday! Now it's Saturday or will be soon."
"Um.......?"
"You're 8 hours ahead of us. It's three in the morning here."
"Sorry.......I'll call again later."

Now there's a mistake I haven't made in a long while.