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Sunday, April 22, 2007

Stone soup














I go to school to collect them. I have stopped sniveling with "self pity" and am fully prepared to deal with the onslaught of recriminations that I am about to batter me.

“Hi!” I blurt to the first one. He looks at me, head on one side.
“Hey! You are still talkin dah funny. Open!” he commands. I obey. “You are not been fixed? No fries? No "fries" at dah restaurant?” His last few syllables head for the skies as he throws himself backwards in a rage against the unfairness of it all. This is timed perfectly to collide with the arrival of his brother. Although I have said nothing to this one, his brother’s reaction is the only information he needs. The braces and elastics are still in place, which to them means, that we will not be going to a restaurant to celebrate my release from my "mouth corset."

My daughter arrives to survey the scene. She glances at me, my tight lips and raised eye brows. “Oh no! It’s not fair! You promised, you promised, you promised!” Everyone is wailing much too loudly for me to be able to make myself heard, let alone understood. I go into mime mode which affords me a little credence. Marcel Marco has nothing on me. I cheat and pull out a large piece of paper, and unroll it slowly. The "icons" and words map the solution.

I feel like Cinderella’s Godfairy – ye shall go to the restaurant, where I shall slurp soup and be happy to have fulfilled my troth.

8 comments:

Haddayr said...

Oh, I'm sorry you haven't been freed!

And I have been there, with Arie, of course. Getting it through to them that they _haven't_ been disappointed is the hardest part, sometimes.

Especially, I imagine, with a wired jaw.

Elaine Vigneault said...

I'd love to add your blog to the 2k bloggers montage and directory, but I need a picture of you, not a goldfish. If you want to resubmit your info, go here: http://www.2kbloggers.com/opt-inopt-out/

Jerry Grasso said...

What's the new timetable for a more free mouth?

Melissa said...

I'm sorry your mouth is still wired. I've been there :S It's amazing how kids clamp onto an idea and if it doesn't work out EXACTLY as planned, then everything is ruined. Of course, I can be that way too...

aspiemom said...

I'm sorry! :^(

You didn't say when you were getting it off, did you?

Hugs-

slouching mom said...

That is just plain wrong, that your mouth is still hurting and wired up, and they are upset with you because they cannot go out to dinner.

Welcome to parenting.

(The other week I got yelled at by Ben because I should have known to have paper fasteners on hand in the house for his homework. Excuse me? Why is it not the teacher's fault for not telling parents to buy the damn things in advance of sending the work home?)

kristina said...

This reminds me of times when I've been sick and Charlie insisted we go out, or wanted to go running in the front yard and up from the sick bed would I drag myself............

Of stern stuff we are made of. (More than any stone.)

gretchen said...

This is so classic!! Never mind that YOU'RE the one who hasn't been able to eat solid food forever! The kids think they are the ones who are suffering! I love it!

 
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