Magic Marker Best shot Monday

Hosted by "Tracy" at "Mother May I," but the photo-picture below will whizz you right there with one click.

Just call me snap happy.

Nasty, scary, Halloweenish piccy at the bottom!

20 months ago I had jaw surgery which disrupted our family life quite considerably. Recently, I nipped back to the surgeon to finish off a little unfinished business, a replacement implant and a bone graft, the cause of a great deal more moaning from me.

Once home again, I examine the x-ray closely, just to check that the new dental implant really has been embedded in my jaw, pop a couple of pills, tie an ice-pack around my head and hide the black and white sheet under a pile of other papers. I head off for the easy option, computer time and supervising the creation of new Spores. Their enthusiasm for the new game is a delight and also allows me to have some valuable recovery time. The principle of the game is to design a creature that is best able to survive and reproduce or alternatively, the basics of evolution and Darwinism.

My youngest son talks incessantly as he creates, “dem bones, dem bones, dem dry bones.” It’s an off shoot from the whirl of Halloween, a holiday that has previously been off the radar but has now been enthusiastically embraced by one and all.

The two headed Spore he has made roars jocularly. “What are you going to name it dear?”
“Er…….Mummy…..kins……osaurus.”
“Oh……that’s……nice.”
“It is being jus like you!” he beams. I peer at the screen and the lurid coloured, short clawed, long tailed creature.
“Oh……?”
“It is be having… …she is be having……two necks.”
“Yes, two necks and two heads, funny shaped heads with big……fangs.”
“Yes…..jus like you!”
“But I don’t have two heads dear.”
“Hmmmmm…......I know……but .......you are having "two necks...unner......under your skin." How come you are having two necks…......…and one head?” This is far too an existential conversation for my tiny brain in my one addled cranium to compute, especially under the influence of Vicodin. My daughter joins us to admire his Spore Creature. “Ooo, I get it! It’s just like yur x-ray mom!”

The spinal column appears twice, left and right at the edge of the x-ray!

Not for the first time, I am speechless, either due to jaw ache, head ache or both.

Daily Daub

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Blog awards

Please Scroll down for the Daily Daub

"Mary the Teach" over at "Work of the Poet" has very kindly given me this award! Thank you so much for thinking of me. This was exceptionally well timed after four consecutive nights of the nocturnal!

I'm happy to pass this on to "MOM-NOS" at "MOM - Not Otherwise Specified," in the hope that this will encourage her to give us a few more, or maybe more frequent lessons. Her family life has changed considerably since we first 'met' and I appreciate that her time is severely sandwiched with numerous pressure and responsibilities, but we can but try!

Also to "Casdok" and her sterling new blog which puts the faces to the 'label' of autism, in all it's many facets, here at the "Faces of Autism." This is particularly heart warming for me as although I think I know all the bloggers featured to date, many do not post pictures of their delightful children. I think each and every one deserves a bravery award for illustrating just how truly delightful all our children are, if everyone would just stop with the stereotypes......although I am the most guilty when it comes to typecasting!

Then to "Sharon" at the "Family Voyage," as her political insight that keeps me abreast of what's ocurring back home, the general trend of opinion as well as her family doings, help keep me grounded. I won't mention the homeschooling aspects as that's just far too intimidating for people with little brains like me.

Alright, I admit it, I am in awe of the homeschooling mob, er....sorry...I meant blogs. I have a hard enough time finding time to blog, I cannot imagine finding the time if I were homeschooling too, although to be fair, just the thought of homeschooling makes my yellow back stripe glow neon. So I feel it's only fair to note a few of those tremulously strong women who also homeschool, such as "Mrs. G" at "the Homeschoolnet", "Kaber" who blogs at "All About my Boys" and "Frog's Mom" at "4-frogs." These supremo parents sometimes post their schedules, enough to make the mind boggle I can tell you, and they certainly make me think and teach me more than a thing of two!








"Joey's Mom" at "Life with Joey" has very kindly given me this delightful award.

I'm happy to pass this along to "Lori" at "Spinning Yellow" who always makes me hunt her down due to a lack of RSS feed!

Also to "Laa and Family" at "Mom Embracing Autism," which sort of tell you all you really need to know, but more importantly adds to her growing list of very well deserved awards!

Then to "The Bishops Wife" who also blogs about some spectrumy issues with verve and class, but with a title of "The Pentecostal Pariah" how could we resist!

Also to "Osh" at "the House that Osh Built," where her family enjoy the same ups and downs as the rest of us, with a healthy dollop of good humour, without sentimentality and a realistic approach to the curve balls that hit us all. [usually in the head when we're least expecting them!]

Then to "Rhemashope" at "Autism in a Word," where she ceaselessly adopts a positive spin on the complexities of life with a rare cheerfulness and perspective.

Also to lovely "Linda" at "Are we there yet." Sometimes it's hard to put your finger on quite why you warm to a particular blog. Linda's life and mine have little in common. She works full time and her children are older. She's in a different State and experiences weather and seasons. It could be that Linda's is one of the first blogs that I felt comfortable commenting upon. I know that whenever I turn up there I will enjoy what I read, what she has written even though her posts run the gamut. Linda is my soft spot to fall.








Dear "T" from "Send Chocolate" very kindly gave me this, "Kick Ass" award. This was especially timely for me, lost in the fog of Vicadin, searching x-rays for my new implant and in a state of more general confusion than usual. I always love visiting her blog, partly due to the content, since I'm obviously biased in that department, partly because the chocolate reference reminds me of heady days when I was just starting a business called "Tamsin Truffles" and partly because she always evokes such interesting debates where her readers actually participate!



First to "Mama Mara" at "Mama of the Edge," which would have been my own alternative title I sometimes think. This is another mum who tells it like it is, pulls not punches, the rough and the smooth, the expansions and contractions, the frustrations and joys.

Also to "Sheila" at "Ma Vie Folle" [That's "My Crazy Life" in French,] who acts on her words, puts her words into practice and is doing a fine job of achieving the goals that many of us aspire to. She also taught me the importance of clicking on the sponsorship links, but some of us learn more slowly than others.

Then to "Michelle" at ""Life of Riley, full soul ahead!." I would especially recommend that everyone follows her link on this post called "Who does she think" Click on the link in that post and I promise you're in for a real treat. I'd like to make it compulsory for all female bloggers, but I try and suppress my tyrannical traits! Suffice to say that if ever you are inclined to throw in the towel and give up completely then this may provide a little welcome battery boost to the ever so slightly jaded creative juices! I'm going to pop it in my sidebar because navigation is always a challenge.

Lastly, I should like to pass this smidge of an award to "Lime" at the "House of Lime."






I was dreading checking out who the 100,000 visitor to my blog might be. It is a little known fact that I have a considerable number of visitors, searching via google, on the term 'babes in the wood.' I fear that they are all sadly disappointed. Hence I was delighted to learn through my Vicodin fog, that the 100,000th visitor was a familiar pal, also a familiar pal that was kind enough to comment. Be assured that if you have the time to nip along and visit her blog, you will always be greeted with a warm welcome.

Cheers dears

Twiddling with the ledger

Please scroll down for
SOOC and Smiley Saturday

They all have some version of it, the twiddle syndrome. It is of course extremely annoying. However, I thought I should better detail this particular twiddle because whist it is terribly irritating, one day it may not be there any more. Elimination or extinguishing the behaviour, would be designated as progress, but I will also miss it in some strange way that I don’t really understand.

In his book “Look me in the Eye,” "John Elder Robinson" details many skills, talents and abilities that he experienced as a child, which were later displaced by other skills, such that the former intuitive capabilities were no longer available to him. It makes me hopeful, but also cautious.



In our house, like many houses with children, many objects are on the floor. Not just furniture and toys but other things. Within minutes of their wakefulness a whole slew of things hit the floor such as cushions, sofa cushions, anything that happened to be on either. This means that the floor space becomes an obstacle course in seconds. This wouldn’t be a problem per se, but my children also have difficulty navigating their space and frequently trip over things that aren’t even there. The obstacle course makes the task of moving from A to B even more hazardous.

My eldest son, speech delay aside, is now far more willing to communicate with us verbally and voluntarily. It is at first light that he is most willing to talk. He talks primarily about Pokemon. Through the haze of dawn he chats. As he chats his feet propel him over a radius of approximately three yards in constant movement. As he moves, his feet come into contact with an object. The object sticks to his feet like a magnet, even if it is made of plastic or cloth or paper. The object moves similarly to a ball that is being dribbled by an expert soccer player, but in slow motion. As the object tumbles between his feet, clenched by toes and glued from one ankle to another, the words flow from his mouth with a sweet breathy expression. It is very hard to concentrate on the words, as my eyes are distracted by the object. It is quite mesmerizing.

I already know how to correct this. I need to take him by the shoulders to orientate him towards me, his audience, and remove the distracter. Experience tells me that if I ground him; ‘stand still while your talking!’ and remove the object, his words will dry up, the smiling expression faulter, so I refrain, and just listen. People are unlikely to listen to a spinning speaker but somehow I suspect that given time, he will adjust himself, as he grows older and more things fall into place.

These days it’s also reciprocal, not just a monologue as he asks me pertinent questions about my own preferences, questions that I am supposed to answer. As I stumble for an answer, whilst the object tumbles, he is patient with me, as my brain searches for the right words. I’m sure my annoyance and confusion is well disguised. As I gape like a fish, my mind struggles with word retrieval. He steps across to me to pause and place an index finger on my chin, fix me with soft brown eyes, “it’s o.k. mom, I know that "you are being tired,” he beams, “dere you go!” he puts the two foot, Halloween spider from his feet into my hands and scampers off.

SOOC

As a die in the wood pacifist, probably a retaliation towards Service life, I was careful to ensure that none of my children would ever be exposed to weapons of any shape, form or description. It was a blanket ban. I suspect, that my 'anti war' campaign was ineffectual. My daughters' interests fell more into the tree climbing category of physical activity. They were who they were, regardless of my preferences.

When the boys came along, I decided to adopt the same ineffectual campaign, all the more so, since wise people told me that 'boys would be boys.' As it turned out pretend play wasn't high on their preferred list of activities, with or without props of any kind. As it turned out, many quite ordinary household items were already considered lethal weapons by them, instruments of torture to be avoided at all costs.

They have their own way or working through issues and overcoming obstacles, even if the picture is ever so hazy.




Clarity comes to s[he] who waits.

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Processing

For some reason I am compelled into another pointless debate with my children.

“They’re just steak fries really.”
“Mom! They’re green. You can’t eat green potatoes, that’s bad!”
“They’re green because of the parsley and Rosemary. Parsley potatoes.”
“Ghastly potatoes? Dey are for Halloween?”
“Not ‘ghastly,’ PARSLEY!”
“Sounds like ‘ghostly!” she sniggers, the kind of snigger that is infectious amongst certain juvenile people.
“They’re highly nutritious, very good for you.”
“I am be eat dah nutritious foods too.” I glare at my youngest child, he who eats only 17 foods.
“Really! Well you do eat fries I suppose. Maybe you could eat a green fry? It could be your new food for the week.”
“No.”
“See, I knew you were just teasing me.”
“It don’t have one.”
“It don’t…….it doesn’t have one what dear?”
“It don’t have one box.”
“Box? What kind of a box?”
“A box dat is saying dah nutritional content. I am only eat dah food wiv dah box.”
“Great. So that effectively means that you won’t eat anything home-made, only over processed, store bought food!”

I pout.

He says nothing.

Everyone else sniggers.

He grins hugely.

Thursday 13 # 167




Thirteen Things about how to make an emergency last minute Halloween Costume Poncho Or All cows may have two udders 1. Take one child with arms fully extended at shoulder height. 2. Measure from wrist to wrist. 3. Buy fabric, fold in half and cut one semi circle halving the measurement in [2]. 4. Fold into a quarter and make two slashes to form an X in the centre, adjust size to fit original child’s head size. 5. Cut out circle from the centre and interface with similar sized off-cut of fabric and include an additional slash at the front neck for a snug fit. 6. Hem outer circle. 7. Attach neck closure and decorate as required. 8. Permit brothers to borrow poncho for pretend play. 9. Refuse to make a pair of fake horns for each boy as an accessory. 10. Refuse to make realistic udder as in ‘Back in the Barnyard.’ 11. Explain the difference between cows and bulls, again. 12. Refuse to make fake bull accessory. 13. Reconsider reasonableness versus rashness of the udders as a compromise.




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Wordless Special Exposure Wednesday

Now is the time to practice, practice, practice!
9 days to wear those costumes and find all their faults.
9 days to model and role play.
9 days to practice that phrase, 'trick or treat?'
9 days to accept that all candy is not equal.
9 days to practice coping skills for disappointments such as trading.
9 days to practice holding a torch in one hand, a bucket in the other, walking as a group, managing your costume, negotiating steps, pathways, traffic and other revelers.

Can we do this?

Yes we can!







If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

Tackle it Tuesday - Boo

Just a wee little tackle, just in time for the holiday. Which holiday?
Why Halloween of course?




As with most things American, when this first happened to our family, I wondered what on earth was happening? But over the years I have learned not to psycho-analyze these things and instead join in the fun.

What you will need:-
Copy the text and picture from the bottom of the post, and print out two copies
Two little bags
treats that will fit inside the little bags
Embellishments and decorations to meet your little people's needs

Assemble

Now you and your offspring decide who your victims shall be. Wait until dark. Dash up to the victim's front door, ring the bell as if the bats are on the way, drop the bag and leg it behind the nearest, largest bush to hide. Spy on your victims through the branches and watch their state of confusion. Leave safely when the coast it clear.


Is that clear?

Need any additional information or do you get it?

I got it, once I ignored the psychobabble.

It should bring a great deal of childish glee to your household and someone else's.

Here are the sheets to copy:-

They are available from this site "here."

So any lingering doubts, queries, questions or confusions?

Good, I'm glad it's all perfectly clear to you.

Enjoy.

Backstory-

First of all I should like to point out that this year, finally, we did manage to complete this activity.

Secondly, I would stress that on balance, I would have to admit that it involved a greater degree of hilarity and a lesser degree of angst and confusion.

How can this be?

Well they're bigger of course.

Why would such a simple activity be anything less than delightful?

Ah, well, that's the real question isn't it.

One of the cardinal rules of child rearing, any child, is consistency.

If we gloss over the standard difficulties of completing anything which vaguely resembles 'a craft,' then there are a whole slew of illogical inconsistencies to address. It is a social skills nightmare. For instance, generally speaking, ringing people's doorbells and running away, is a habit that we would choose to discourage in our children as responsible parents, yet for some reason, the Boo reason, this is suddenly o.k.? How bizarre is that?

Additionally, it is an additional purposeless trip in the car. Ideally we would have walked but time constraints, darkness and walking, are never a good combination mid-school week, so I had to cheat and keep some variables at bay.

Normally I drag my children with me into the store or the post office muttering, "no you can't stay in the car, it's illegal to leave you unsupervised." But for this exercise one child accompanies me to Boo, the other two wait in the car, in the dark, alone and unsupervised so that they can watch the fun. How come the cardinal rule changed?

Fun. Well of course that it something that is almost impossible to explain, because as we watch the parents and children come out of their houses to collect their Boo, they have the nerve to look confused. Confused is an expression that we now recognise. Why would we wish to wantonly cause confusion to complete strangers? Why have the rules changed.

Talking of which, how come it's suddenly ok. to commune with strangers? Who changed the rules?

If it is ok to commune with strangers, why don't we have to use our nice words and say hello to them? Who changed the rules?

Fall out

What has been the result of this activity, overall, now that the dust has settled? Any long term effects?

Well the short term effect is that my son is now mesmerized by the 'confused' expression. He can mimic it exactly and copies the little boy on the doorstep, chin to chest looking at the floor with the accompaniment of 'he looked like dis!'

The long term effect?

"Faster dan dah kids in Narnia! My mum is run like lightening!"

Bear in mind that the 'kids in Narnia' movie, run in slow motion.

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Cut and paste
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Best shot Magic marker Monday

Hosted by "Tracy" at "Mother May I," but the photo-picture below will whizz you right there with one click.

Just call me snap happy.

[Elder daughter]



How to recycle your envelopes and send a message at the same time!
She's so diligent and tries to get off junk mailing lists, maybe this will work?





[Younger daughter]

Can't resist a theme when I spot one!

Mono Metamorphosis - sex education required

“I am unisex, I am unisex, I am unisex,” he chants for no particular reason that I can fathom.
“What do you mean dear?”
“I am meaning dat I am being part cat.”
“Oh yes, I remember the ‘part cat.’”
“He is being dah part dog.”
“Is he indeed. I wondered why he was growling. What’s the er......‘unisex’ bit?”
“Uni is be meaning one.”
“Gosh yes, I know that too. But…..er…….?”
“Only one part is being dog or cat, so it be ‘uni.’”
“Yes true……I was just wondering…..about the…..which part……bit…….er….?”
“Dah mouth is dah sex part.”
“Really……that is a surprise.”
“Yes coz his dog mouth eats bones only bones, uni.”
“Ah, I see….and?”
“My mouth, my cat part only eats dah goldfish.”
"Ah!"
"Um.......I fink I am have dah wrong word."
"Oh good. I mean.....really?"
"I am not mean 'sex' I am mean 'species'!"
"Wow, easy to get those two muddled."
"I am uni-species!"
"But if you're part cat and part human wouldn't that be duo?"
"No."
"No?"
"Bye, bye, bye, bye......." shrieks as he runs away before he pops back to clarify, head around the corner, "I am bi-species......dats what I am?"

He grins hugely before disappearing just like a Cheshire cat.

I sometimes wonder?

My child is seemingly "monophagous" upon Goldfish crackers.

I should take him over here:-








"Andrea" over at "Andrea's Buzzing About:"

[I got it right in the end! What a pain in the colon!]

SOOC

Opinions differ but there is a common misconception that autistic people do not enjoy a sense of humour, or alternatively that their sense of humour is hybrid. Personally, I think it's a little more complicated than that. Slapstick is easy. Words and their nuances can be a little more tricky.

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5

They might not be the words I would have chosen but I certainly recognize the feeling of debilitating exhaustion, well spent.

Get the code:-
Cut and paste
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