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Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Friendship cools to acquaintance

“God Madz you look like crap!”
“Yes well that’s international travel for you!”
“I thought they had all that plastic surgery out your way, er cosmetic surgery?”
“Er… they do… I suppose.”
“You should book yourself in for a makeover.”
“I’ll bear that in mind…….if I only had the time.”
“Oh yeah. The kids. Is that them?”
“What are they doing under the table?”
“Playing. It’s a bit noisy, too many people.”
“God I bet you wish you had your tubes tied before you left for the good old US of A!”
“Well, I er…..”
“Still spect it was the old hormones at your time of life. Shit it’s a curse.”
“The hormones or the age?”
“Ah…well it’s a bit more complicated than…..”
“But I mean, if you’d have known, it you’d have had any idea…”
“I'm sorry?”
“It’s just….. you know….. no-one would choose to have….. you know….?”
“Actually, I don’t know. What do you mean?”
“Look , no offence or anything but if I knew I was gonna have a couple of …well you know…?”
“Spit it out why dontcha?”
“Fuck Maddy, I don’t mean anything it’s just you know, if you had a choice…?”
“Look at them. Just look at them!”
“I am! They’re lying on the carpet Madz, you know, they’re all, you know, weird and well it’s like they’re all alone, like you, know …..there’s no-one else here!”
“Is that really what you see?”
“I mean they look kindof ok but they’re not really here are they?”

Wordy Wednesday

Miss Wordy Wednesday drops by for a chat.
“Hi I wasn’t expecting you to post today! I thought you’d dropped off the planet?”
“Well I aim to please.”
“What happened?”
“It would take too long to explain right now but high drama and international travel should just about cover it for present purposes.”
“O.k. I’ll let you off. You get to play the ‘jet lag’ card, but just the once.”
“So what have we got today then?”
“Not self explanatory?”
“Hmm I can never be sure with you.”
“Have a go.”
“It’s one of those fashioned labyrinth toys?”
“A Christmas present?”
“Sort of.”
“So……you gave one of them this present and……they hated it at first….and then…..they tried and tried despite the dogdy fingers, eventually they did it?”
“Very good.”
“Well that was short and sweet for a change.”
“Not quite.”
“Not quite what?”
“Well it’s not the right answer, a good one nonetheless but a bit wide of the mark.”
“Huh, might of known it was too easy.”
“Ah right. Well it’s actually my toy.”
“Really, I wouldn’t have thought you would bother with such trifles?”
“My mother gave it to me several eons ago.”
“Ah! I know. It’s an antique and……… they broke it……..but they said sorry, so you didn’t feel so bad, a triumphant apology?”
“What a vivid imagination you have.”
“I like to think that I can play along.”
“Indeed you do.”
“You’re just humouring me huh?”
“Very well reasoned.”
“But wrong?”
“So? I give up.”
“Well I dig it out every year and play with it on Christmas Eve, on and off on Christmas day, until eventually I manage to get to number 60.”
“Right so…….no, I’m drawing blanks here.”
“Well broadly speaking the children aren’t really interested in what I am doing.”
“They were interested this time?”
“No, that would be asking too much, they just did they own thing.”
“Well you can’t really compete with ‘electronics’ can you?”
“Too true.”
“So where are we going with this?”
“Usually, if I say something like ‘hey look at this’ or ‘see that pink flying elephant in the sky’ or ‘I think a monster has eaten all your electronics!’ anything like that, then nobody really pays any attention, they just pootle along in their own sweet way.”
“Ah yes, I remember you saying that you had to be some kind of a Cheerleader type to catch their attention.”
“Right. On the whole there’s not really any point in saying anything to them unless you engage their attention first, and then you’d better have something pretty darned interesting to say to follow up.”
“The positive reinforcement thing, make it worth their while or next time they won’t both again.”
“I feel exhausted already, and that’s just thinking about it not actually doing it.”
“Well there’s the thing!”
“What thing?”
“I was sitting at the table with them.”
“You sitting! Did you have an attack of the vapours or something?”
“Oh very funny, I do sit down sometimes you know.”
“Well I was concentrating on my toy whilst they played with their Dad and I reached the end of the labrynth and squeaked “ooo look! I made it to sixty!””
“They all responded! They clapped and hooted and said things like ‘good job!’”
“A new first?”
“Yes! And spontaneous, no prompting, nothing, it was quite staggering.”
“How old are they now?”
“Lets just say they’re not babies or toddlers, older,…. every year.”
“I can’t even conceive of……well…….I suppose…..sort of waiting so long for something so……ordinary. I hope that doesn’t sound mean?”
“You? Never mean, but yes you’re right, the ordinary around here is so extraordinary.”
“I hope you thanked the therapists?”
“I shall, you can be sure of that.”

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