A circuitous route

If you had asked me a year ago, I would have been pretty categorical about quite a few things:-
He will not go outside willingly
He has a close affinity with cats and is fearful of dogs
If it’s not yellow or golden it is less preferred
He has no interest in plants or gardening
He only eats 7 to 13 food items
He is obsessed with Pokemon and electronics, and has no interest in anything else
I am always hunting for motivators

Whilst these points are more or less true, at the time they seemed quite overwhelming. It can be difficult to see the big picture when you’re concentrating on the minutiae. However perspectives alter as children grow, and all children grow even when they exist upon such a narrow and restricted diet.

All to often something unexpected clicks into gear and we shoot off in an entirely new direction.

I am mid conversation with my son in law Mr. B, as we paw over the seed box. We debate which seeds would be most suitable as a gift for his mother in Brazil, her colour preferences, the climate, custom restrictions, when my youngest son interjects himself, “I am love!”
“Yes indeed. What do you love dear?”
“Dah seeds,” he oozes with exaggerated ‘z’s.’
“Really? Which ones? The yellow Marigolds?” I guess as I waggle the seed packet before his nose.
“Noooooo,” is the breathy response. His finger tips walk through the paper packets, tentative and brave.
“Deez are the ones I am wanting.”
“Carrots? You don’t like carrots! You certainly don’t eat them!”
“I am grow carrots……pleaz?”
I step towards the door to the garden but his skips ahead and charges outdoors clutching the packet in a perfect pincher grip. Together we spend a thoroughly pleasant ten minutes in soil preparation and sowing. Yes, I said together. He is compliant at every step and there are lots of steps. Not only is he compliant, he is amiable and mysteriously motivated to perfectly complete a whole new task. But of course this is not enough for me. I just have to know.
“So……….why carrots?”
“Coz den my family will be eating dem.”
“Why do you want your family to eat carrots?”
“Den everyone will be seeing in dah dark, jus like me is doing.”
“You can see in the dark?”
“Meow.”

I do so love being proved wrong, narrow minded and overly pessimistic.




This could be yours:-




Don't forget to add your name to the "list" and help spread the word for the giveaway.

Talking of giveaways "Sue Klein" at "Model Me Kids" is also having a giveaway but the difference here is that you can enter to win for your child's "teacher!" and you know how I love teachers.

Lastly but by no means leastly, for anyone who feels that they are also miserable old skeptics like me, then go and watch this "video" on "U-tube" where Brits are at their very best.

Cheers dears

Monarchs in the Republic

If you want to be noticed at the annual Bunnies and Bonnets Parade........



Motivation? If you're 'noticed' you are more likely to win the candy being distributed by the generous parade goers.


This could be yours:-




Don't forget to add your name to the "list" and help spread the word for the giveaway.


If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

On another note, if you have a spare mo perhaps you may be able to help the "Fresh Air Fun," which seeks to let inner city children experience time out in the wilds as you can see at their "website" where there are other videos about this non-profit venture, but this video below is my favourite = wordless!

Shark infested waters

This week’s tackle is mammoth and unexpected as my boys have hit the Houdini stage of development. As with all special needs parents, vigilance is our watch word and when that doesn’t work we use padlocks, deadbolts and trip alarms. After that, the ammunition possibilities are a little limited.



I shall keep this brief as the children are on Spring break and I’m writing whilst they are asleep. I think my own sleep schedule is now officially canceled. I had another post entirely planned but this is more important.

I returned home today from the passport office to find both the boys in the front garden where they had climbed over the five and a half foot wall to avoid the locks on the door. Oh yes, well done boys, I am so impressed with your climbing skills, co-ordination skills, spatial awareness, teamwork, landing safely skills without splitting your respective noggins open on the concrete floor.






A wee while back “Mama Mara” suggested that I use my broken pots for mosaics, however, I have another and MUCH better idea. Jagged, shards of pottery shall henceforth be cemented to the top of every wall on the premises above a moat full of sharks. Well…….......maybe if I had a little more time. Hence meanwhile I shall be using the lovely Spring Break to teach my children compliance.






Don't forget to check out other "tacklers" as well as "Trish" and the "freebie list" at the end of last week's "tackle," giveaway either in the box or as a comment. You don't need to have a blog to enter, merely a postal address.

One time Rule

Hosted by "Tracy" at "Mother May I," but the photo-picture below will whizz you right there with one click.

Just call me snap happy.

Yes the holiday is upon us. Mayhem ensues. Entertain, play and fun are the order of the day but pretty soon that can dissolve into chaos, at least around here in any case. I am actually writing this a week ahead of time so that I am prepared for the onslaught, especially after this evening,s excitement. Excitement comes in many forms, be that a general over stimulation or the frenzy of anticipation. Whatever it is, we experienced it tonight, a collection of whirling Dervishes.

I knew matters had reached the pinnacle when I said goodnight to them. We have a little night time ritual, different for each one. I won’t bore you with the mushy details but suffice to say that once I had finished my little luvvies and stood to leave, my son asked why we hadn’t had the long version of the luvvies? As we had just finished the long version of the luvvies, I was less than impressed. My words hadn’t registered at all. Not one of them. It brings a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘whispering sweet nothings.’

It made me think, think hard. It made me think that if I am to single handedly survive 11 glorious days with my children, 24/7, I need a little more ammunition to guarantee survival, if not sanity. Hence this is what I came up with. It’s a deal. A deal between me and them. I ask once, they respond. Yes, I can hear you cackling from all the way over there. You know I am a rule obsessed goal freak, but in this particular instance I have an ulterior motive. The motive is to remind myself to first obtain the attention of the child to whom I wish to speak, before I speak. Yes I know it’s step 101 but all too often I find that I slip up on the basics and am thoroughly surprised when I’m haring around the house nagging three smallish individuals many multitudes of times. It’s exhausting, for them and for me, as well as being completely pointless. Far better to do it once, properly, for everyone’s sake.

I’m sure that many of you have already survived the Spring Break but if you have any tips, I’m all ears. Interestingly, the circle still stinks of permanent marker four hours later after I’ve tidied up. Smell-aversion should certainly grab everyone’s attention!



So here I am with my reminder. As yet I haven’t decided whether to make it into a pendant, a mask or a head band, but I’ll keep you posted.


Don't forget to add your name to the "list" to the giveaway and help spread the word.

Something sweet for the weekend

My pal at "Life with Joey" drew my attention to an interesting "video." If you have a mo, nip over to "Joey's Mum" and read "her" words before you watch it.

Do not be alarmed that your computer has broken, the sound track has been disabled which I might just have noticed if I'd cleaned my bifocals first.


Don't forget to add your name to the "list" and help spread the word. I have a terrible feeling that I'll miss the opportunity to test USPS by sending it abroad. I need more foreigners. Know any foreigners? I wonder if it's because I'm using the wrong word? Do foreigners know what a giveaway is? Foreigners! Foreigners! Calling all foreigners! It's a freebie!

Cheers dears

Down tools

Get the code:-
Cut and paste
from this little
boxy thing below

<a href="http://www.lighteningonline.com/"><img src="http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q158/mmcewen/smiley-saturday-1.jpg" /></a>

Work paused temporarily due to bad tools.

It should be like this....

But sadly it's like this.

Yes I know, a bad workman always blames his tools

Don't forget to add your name to the "list." if you've not done so already.

Vicarious Story telling

One of the many advantages of two generations of children is that family stories are re-hashed and regurgitated. There are obstacles to be overcome with such story telling. If one generation of children grew up in England and the newer generation grow up in the States then there are a great many discrepancies between the two factions. Their experiences differ greatly.

This becomes all too apparent one night at the dinner table when rowdiness rules the roost. She turns to me and rolls her eyes over the din. She slumps back in her chair to observe her younger siblings raucous, unbridled and ever so ever so loud shenanigans. “Hey!” she bellows with large accompanying arm movements.
“Wot?”
“I want to tell you something.”
“Wot?”
“When I was little……about your age,” she adds as she glares at each one of them in turn, “I used to be loud too.” None of them says a word, either because they find it hard to imagine that their big sister was ever their age or because they are all different ages or because they cannot imagine her being loud or all three.
“One day mum went to meet her friend at a pub for lunch and I went too.”
“Pub! Pub? Wot is it being ‘a pub’?”
“A pub is where you go to drink.”
They look at her in confusion so I nudge and whisper “that probably wasn’t terribly helpful.”
“Right. A pub is where you go to eat, and drink alcohol, a bit like a restaurant or a diner.” Three pairs of eyes widen at the trigger word ‘alcohol.’
“You are drink alcohol when you was being a kid?”
“No I drank orange juice but that’s not the point. The point….” Her tale is cut short as the conversation is now stuck firmly in the mire of ‘just say no.’ They would only be slightly more shocked to hear that she drank rat poison. The din grows louder as they perseverate over the evils of drink but she reins them in to pursue her tale.
“ANYWAY!”
They pause and return their attention to their big sister. “Anyway, as I was saying……we were in the pub……eating…….and I was being very naughty.”
“Naughty?” they chorus.
“Yes…..so mum’s friend told me a secret.”
“A secret?”
“Yes…….mum’s friend told me that she used to have noisy naughty children too, just like me…….” She pauses to brilliant effect.
“So what do you think happened to her children, those noisy naughty children?” I am suddenly more than a little worried where this is going as I am the one who will have to deal with the fall out, probably for some considerable period of time, but she’s on a roll and there’s no stopping her now.
“Well……mum’s friend told me that her children were so naughty and noisy that she left them in the pub, went home and she never saw them again.”
“She losted her children?”
“Yes she did.”
“Yur kidding right?”
“Dat is way bad.”
“England" is evil!”
They scatter to the four winds before she has the chance to finish.
“Great! Did you have to tell them that?”
“They didn’t give me a chance to finish.”
“You know we’re going to "England" in less than two months?”
“So?”
“Well I was looking forward to the odd pub lunch here and there, maybe.”
“Do you think that’s going to be a problem? Just from what I said?”
“Believe you me, that little nugget of information is boring a hole into their brains to lodge there quite firmly until hell freezes over.”
“Better get some take out menus "then.”


Don't forget to add your name to the "list."

More rare than gold

Special education teachers often get a bad rap although that’s not my personal experience. There are some real gems out there, underpaid and undervalued but nonetheless still giving of their best.

Here in California when over 22,000 pink slips have been issued, I think it’s important to pay tribute to those who work in special education, the professionals we trust with the care of our children, both teachers and aides because it’s all about teamwork. Not only do they need to teach the curriculum and cater to each of the differing special needs of their charges, they also need to deal with the unexpected. I can think of no better way to illustrate the unexpected than to demonstrate the unexpected with an example.

This is of course hearsay as I wasn’t there myself at the time.

My son and his pals enjoy the addition of a new play fellow in their classroom The new chap has a lot of catching up to do because he is in a new environment. Like most ‘new kids,’ he has lots of questions that need lots of answers, ordinary questions, such as the rules. Most children want to know the rules but many children are of a very literal frame of mind, which means that the rules are taken quite literally. Hence the other children half listen to the conversation between the teacher and the new boy as they complete their worksheets.

New boy: “are pets allowed in school?”
Teacher:- “no I’m sorry to tell you that no pets are allowed in school.”
New boy: “are dogs allowed on the school grounds?”
Teacher: “no I’m afraid there’s a strict rule about allowing dogs on the premises, we have to be careful.”
New boy: “are cats allowed on the premises?”
Teacher: “sadly, cats aren’t allowed on school grounds either.” The last sentence is my son’s cue to stand up, walk to the wall to collect his backpack and head towards the exit but his teacher intervenes, “what’s up my friend?”
“Meow!”
“Oh dear. I was forgetting. Of course! You are part cat!”




Did you remember to thank your teachers and aides today?


Don't forget to add your name to the "list."

Meet Aqua

Spring has sprung and we out hunting down new pets for free.









If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

Don't forget to add your name to the "list."

p.s. someone with a jolly big brain pointed out to me that "Etsy" has an RSS feed, so if you’re really interested in the pi bowls you may wish to consider subscribing to that feed because I rarely write in real time which means if / when the pi bowls are ever ready they’ll be posted to the "Etsy site" way before I get around to mentioning it here.

Just another old skinky day

This blue tummied Skink is a relative of the lizard family. In our family they are more valuable than jewels and far more iridescent.





Naming ceremony to follow shortly.


If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

Don't forget to add your name to my GIVEAWAY.

Reasonable People can agree to differ

As some of you may already know, "April" is "Autism" "Awareness" month. Whilst this is a "controversial" "matter" I would like to help people understand that an autism diagnoses does not mean that my ‘real’ children were not stolen nor is it worse than cancer nor death. These perspectives are a great dis-service to people, "parents and children" who struggle with those real tragedies. Autistic people and those with special needs deserve to be treated with the same dignity and respect that we offer everyone else on the planet.

As I am now on "Etsy," I am offering this bowl, shipped for free anywhere in the World, as my small contribution.







It's about six inches across and just over two inches high carved in forest green slip, my son's favourite.



Some people are "autistic," "adults," "young people" and "teens," some are "parents" or "single parents" of "autistic" children, there are lots of boys "as" well as "girls," our neighbours and friends. Although you may not be directly affected I am quite certain that you already know someone who is autistic, even if you don't know it. I would encourage you to add your name to the list either for yourself of someone you know. No matter where we are on the spectrum we all basically want the same thing, a better future for autistic people and those with special needs.


We may never achieve awareness but we may be able to encourage people to think differently.

Sorry it’s not a pi dish but the kiln at the studio is backed up and I cannot predict when they might be ready nor how many will come out in one piece.





There are lots of other giveaways available at "Melanie's" site called

"Bloggy Giveaways,"

that may also tempt your fancy.


Best wishes

The Walking Wounded

Hosted by "Tracy" at "Mother May I," but the photo-picture below will whizz you right there with one click.

Just call me snap happy.

Nothing broken thank goodness but with a splint on the left and a sling on the right she only has two other functioning limbs.


The boys teamed up. One issued verbal instructions and the other complied, two things we don't experience very often.



In the meantime someone fiddled with my American message:-



Although I suppose either one works:-



I wonder which one it was?

Which would you choose?

Cheers

Not Adorable

They lie on the floor of the waiting room whilst their sister has her second batch of x-rays. A middle aged woman like me, peers at a magazine through her bifocals with the cord dangling. Each of my boys has a Pokemon toy in each hand. The receptionist and her assistant exchange files behind their desk. The Pokemons chatter together quietly in their own language, assisted by my sons. An elderly gentleman rests his hands on his stick as he waits for his wife to return. It’s a long wait. Two high school girls wait for their father. A couple of youngsters saunter in with rucksacks straight from school with their Dad. They sit close by as their father completes paperwork, concentrates on filling the boxes. My boys continue to play, quietly. This is the first occasion that I have ever been able to manage them all without incident in a waiting room, but of course I’m not really managing them at all, they’re managing themselves. If they were between 3 and maybe six years old, no-one would turn a hair, but of course they’re so much bigger. I could actually do what other people do, things like read a book whilst they play, but I don’t as for once, ironically, even though I could, I’d rather watch instead.

It’s a diary moment, a milestone, just a little bit later than some other people. The familiar tune of a Nintendo DS game twinkles and sparks attention. My boys prop themselves up on their elbows to look across at the back of the open game console, in somebody else’s hands, “d’ya wanna play wiv us?” he offers in a thoroughly unprecedented socially appropriate manner. The gamer and his brother flash glimpse over the console, sneer and resume gaming. “Oh well,” he sighs as they continue to Pokemon, no meltdown, no reaction, no bitterness, a competent acceptance of a casual, commonplace rebuff. I think to myself, because I am biased, ‘go on, have a go, how can you resist, they’re so adorable!’ It’s just another one of those occasions that I never imagined we would ever experience, when I know that everything will be just fine.



Yes, I'm on "Etsy" now:-

If you require shipping to anywhere other than the United States you can contact me with your location so that I may provide you with the price of shipping for your consideration in advance.

Balance

Get the code:-
Cut and paste
from this little
boxy thing below

<a href="http://www.lighteningonline.com/"><img src="http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q158/mmcewen/smiley-saturday-1.jpg" /></a>

We drive home from school after a quick check of the daily school reports. These notes are invaluable to give a parent a heads up. This lets me know that my older son has exhausted his words bank and that my younger son had a frightfully good day. I encourage frightfully good day to tell us all the details and let the empty bank re-couperate. For some unknown reason there is an excessively high count of "nit wits" on the road, who unfortunately, are also driving. I need to concentrate on his words. I need to concentrate on the nit wits. We pull up to the stop light and another car with open windows. Everyone turns as one and lifts their hands to their ears to examine the occupants, drawn by the 50 decibel musak. We all observe the same thing about this possibly typical family. The driver is a woman who chats on her cell phone, loudly. The small child in the front seat plays with his Nintendo DS. The two larger children in the back seat watch a DVD of cartoons and eat. We drive off with the green light whilst they are still static. I grit my teeth for the inevitable questions:- how come other children are allowed to play electronics when it’s not 5:30, how come other children get to watch the telly any time they like, how come we have to starve in the car for the 7 minute drive home, why do we always have to talk about our day, why do we have to do chores and homework before electronics, …………….but there aren’t any, just a statement,

“I wanna go and live wiv dem.”

Cheers dears

Let me know if the new little share button below works and I think my "Etsy" is up and running, I hope.

2 by 4 and other roadblocks

It’s a pretty ordinary kind of a day once they’ve all headed off for school. I strip two beds and start the laundry, nip out into the garden to plants a couple of packets of sunflower seeds, throw a couple of pots, bake a pair of loaves, take the dog for his customary two hour’s walk, fix two sprinkler heads, trim a couple of pots, carve one, attempt un-blurry photographs of said pots, return to supper preparations. As I peel potatoes at the sink I have the chance to listen to the radio on NPR where Michael Krasny interviews Germaine Greer about her latest fascinating book called Shakespear’s Wife, Anne Hathaway. My hands peel but by brain is back in Merry olde England, the trials of serfs, the division of labour, women’s rights and a whole slew of ancient memories of when I had a fully functioning brain when the phone rings.

The school requests collection of one ever so slightly, physically dented child.

I suspend all productivity and hare off to the school, then to the doctor, the radiologist and finally the Chemist for a sling. No permanent damage except to our finances and to her pride for apparently playing soccer with her hands!

This is why I shall never be an intellectual. Maybe I should buy the book?

Dog Therapy

My older son is a boy of few words. He rarely fills the world with idle chatter but it takes all sorts when it comes to the autism spectrum.

He has been known to wax lyrical on occasions, usually on the subject of Pokemon and more recently Spore, but other than that his silence is particular and dogged. That said, there is a particular dog, his own, who has an undue influence upon him. The influence of Thatcher the dog is all too apparent as we walk the ten minute trip to his first puppy training lesson. As we trot down the road I prepare my son for the hour of tuition, what to expect. I know what to expect because I have already spent six weeks attending the very same class with Thatcher and my daughter. Now it is his turn, my sons.

I worry that the trainer uses more words in the average lungful of breath than many an average Californian. The trainer has a warm and attractive personality. She says the same thing many times and in many different ways which is fabulous for the average learner, but for the differently abled her words are a sea of jumble, verbiage to be tuned out. My only hope is one of her even more advantageous skills. She models the desired behaviour that she teaches with a dog. Forget the words, concentrate on the body movements because my son’s mimicry skills are second to none.

I think these thoughts as I trot next to my son who hangs on to the end of the lead with Thatcher’s long strides on the other end, just enough rope to hang himself. I exude calm over silent panic but of course he’s far more astute than I give him credit for as he hauls the lead into a heel. He pauses, breathless next to Thatcher, poised in a perfect sit. All of a sudden his word bank bursts open with a torrential flood of "reassurance," “iz okay Thatcher, you’d gonna do great, you’re gonna make lots of friends, I’m gonna be there to help you, you’re gonna love the teacher, I’ve got lotsa treats for you, Kindergarten ain’t so bad…….” He continues in this vein for a full 7 minutes of uninterrupted, stutter free syllables until we reach the entrance door. Never say never my friends, we have a pal for life.

The R Word

Please Scroll down for Wordless Wednesday

Superheroes

Guess what we watched this weekend?

If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

Meanwhile I'm still struggling with international postage rates as $45 to the UK is daylight robbery as far as I'm concerned. I may have to limit myself to the good ole US of A initially and expose myself as the tendentious, ethnocentric nincompoop that I really am!

Business unplanned

My tackle this week is a hugely tiny task of how to get up and running on "Etsy."

I don't know if any of you have any experience of "Etsy" but hopefully I'll be ready tomorrow for the start of Autism Awareness Month.

If anyone has any advice you'd like to offer I'd be very grateful for any tips you might be able to share. I'm especially looking to anticipate problems, irritations and other annoyances, things that you did not like about your purchasing experience. I am especially terrified of the Post Office / mailing trips as getting to the post office is a complete nightmare for my family and sadly they're not open when my children are asleep. How tolerant will people be if they place an order and I can't get to the post office for a week? Not very I suspect.

Additionally I now have a load of commissions and bowls that are already spoken for, for a wide variety of charitable events which means I have hardly any to sell. What a twit. Clearly I am in need of some sound business advice.



Cheers dears