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Wednesday, March 14, 2007

From Velcro to zipper

If I had known that bearing children would also mean investing in a truck load of Velcro, I would had bought shares in the company whilst they were still in vitro, but no-one warned me.

To be fair, not many people would have predicted this eventuality. Even now, one of my son's has a serious dose of tactile defensiveness and supersonic hearing. Those two qualities are firm indicators that would guarantee that Velcro, with it’s scratchy surfaces and noisy ripping sounds, would be banned.

However, as it turned out, it soon became the case that PECS with their Velcro backing, ruled the world, or our little corner of it. As long as I didn’t rip them off willy nilly, just kept them on the board, all would be well. Rearranging PECS, adding new ones, removing out moded ones, became a clandestine activity for me. During the wee small hours when everyone slumbered, I would lurk in the kitchen, setting up the PEC board for the next day.

Velcro exists in other areas too, such as shoe closures, an essential tool for any child who has yet to graduate to shoe laces. This is a common enough issue for most young people, but if your fine motor skills are a bit dodgy, it could be a number of years until you can master this feat. Since zips are also a bilateral nightmare boys often transition to them via a Vecro fly in their trousers.

I suspect that most parents feel that raising Frederick or Gemina, is more of a marathon than a sprint. They look forward to the distant time when their child becomes independent and no longer their responsibility. Some older parents and grandparents, also know that the ‘responsibility’ does not end until they themselves are pushing up the daisies, and probably not even then. Whilst I rant and rave about my children’s capabilities and shortcomings, not infrequently, I have cause to note that the ‘spectrum’ is just that, a range of [?]………..possibilites.

We attended the charity bash [translation = benefit] a uniquely American experience, for "Parents Helping Parents [PHP]" Since we are in California, people were dressed accordingly, casual, which includes shoes and shirt, as well as a considerable number of posh frocks. [ translation = fancy dresses] For the purpose of clarity, I should point out that no-one was in costume. [translation = fancy dress] The parents of special needs children enjoyed the company of like minded people, if they had baby sitters. Everyone looks "'normal'" but you can never really tell can you?

The bidding process started for some very worthy prize in the auction after dinner. I continued to chat to my pal in quiet tones. The wine had flowed and there was a great deal of hub bub. My hands operated in conjunction, to help me get my message across. A rogue alien hand, rested on my arm to warn me “careful! Someone will think that you’re bidding with all that waving around.” My hands dropped to my lap, as I wouldn’t wish to be mid-understood.

I nipped out to the loo at an opportune moment. Down the far end of the corridor [translation = hall] a middle aged man knelt on the carpet in front of a teenage boy. The men's restroom was close by. As I went closer, the hub bub of the banqueting hall subsided and his words become audible, “you’re doing a great job, almost there, you can do it. Pull it up a little bit more. If you hold it in your right hand it will be easier. Left hand holds the fabric. Yeah you’re almost there, just a little bit more. Here let me hold the top, that buckle is in the way huh?”

He stood up and hugged him. He talked to the boy’s shoulder as I brushed past, “you’re the greatest guy, do you know that?”

You see what you want to see.

p.s. "Parents Helping Parents [PHP]" is a fabulous organisation that was started by a couple of mums with special needs kids, at their kitchen table.


gretchen said...

I must be up to early, or shouldn't read my blogs before my morning coffee, because you and mom-nos have both made me cry this morning!

Have a good day today.

Mamaroo said...

This one got me a little teary eyes also.

mumkeepingsane said...

Tears and goosebumps here.

Cat said...

Ahh yes the velcro, I buy it from Wal-mart and I but it and playdo at least once a month. Oh and new socks and underwear, I can't forget that :) Your post really touched me today. Thanks for that.


Who needs laces when you have velcro?
Brilliant post.

mysamiam said...

Superb post. I am new to your blog and LOVE it. Can't wait to read more!!!! I so relate to the velcroe. At every door of our house is velcroed a PECS card that says "ask permission" too. Ode to the day Sam actually lets me know he is leaving before he does!!! :)

Anonymous said...

We have velcro too. I admit to trying to use as little as possible. We have the choice board with generic choices on the fridge but I get him to use signs or words whenever possible.

But I am eternally grateful to whoever invented it and velcroed shoes.

Shoelaces are on the 'to be taught' list this summer for my eldest.


chrisd said...

Sam hated the sound of velcro but he's ok now.

Zippers-don't get me started. In addition to being hard to do, they stink. They fall apart in one season.

I loved the last part about the guy buttoning his child's pants. Oh, that I would be like that all the time. Beautiful beautiful

By the by, you asked about what a misercorde is:


It's two things; it's a bench to lean on and its a specific knife used to end a wounded knights/soldier's life if they were dying in battle.

Mom26children said...

When we received our Extreme Makeover house, they told us we would find surprises throughout the house.
I opened up Kiernan's closet and there was the biggest roll of velcro I have ever seen.
They used it throughout our house.
Long live the velcro.

Anonymous said...

The history of perfume goes back to Egypt, although it was prevalent in East Asia as well. Early perfumes were based on incense, not chemicals, so aromas were passed around through fumes. The Roman and Islamic cultures further refined the harvesting and manufacturing of perfumery processes to include other aromatic ingredients.

Thus, the ancient Islamic culture marked the history of modern perfumery with the introduction of spices and herbs. Fragrances and other exotic substances, such as Jasmine and Citruses, were adapted to be harvested in climates outside of their indigenous Asia.

Michelle O'Neil said...

This is so sweet. Doesn't your heart just go out to other parents of kids on the spectrum?

(The best ideas always come from moms at the kitchen table).

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