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Friday, September 28, 2007

Black Sheep bleats with forked tongue

I blame the Celtic blood that courses through my veins, but I believe that budgetary concerns plague everyone. Most people have the monthly cycle of rent, food and utility bills, robbing Peter to pay Paul, as well as the need to conserve energy and save the planet. So often, it is the tiny things, the small extravagances that snap the spine of the bank balance. It is because of these tiny things that I determine to eradicate all extraneous and frivolous expenditure.

I think these thoughts as I wrangle with the child safety cap on the jar. One of the best ways to save pennies, which of course will expand into many thousands of spare dollars, is by controlling the kitchen. Most of us have freezers and the careful homemaker makes full use of it’s magical powers. Why make one, when two are cheaper in the long run? Ban convenience foods and make everything from scratch. Chain yourself to the cooker to liberate your finances long term. If you want to have a healthy family, then a healthy diet is an essential first step. My grip on the jar is as tight as a vice, but it refuses to yield to my will.

Although I lack a pantry, because I am an American, I have a garage full of ‘whole’ things that are simultaneously ‘free’ of all sorts of nasty substances, because I am a nutritional queen. One of the many things that can be eliminated from the diet of the average child, is all those expensive multivitamins. Who needs multivitamins if they follow a sound nutritional formula? I do not believe in indulging children and giving them those sugary, fruity vitamin pills, which is merely the equivalent of candy. It brings about bad habits. Skip the well balanced meal and sink a pint of Ensure. It’s the slippery slope my friend.

The food rules keep changing but the message remains the same, each your greens, Goldfish should be banned, pile up your sugar free mini wheats into a pyramid and drown them in a flood of fat free milk or a soy or rice substitute. Beat your way back to health through diet and reach the island of financial security at the same time. No more of these feeble excuses. The spineless need spinach, the greener the better. Organic and homegrown. Don’t whinge about living in a high rise apartment, there are window boxes and potted versions freely available for the free thinkers. Harvest your own harvest and watch the greenbacks grow.

The jar catapults from grasp. My hand holds the lid. The jar circles on the floor, as the spin slowly dies. The primary coloured gummy bears are scattered over a wide radius of floorboards, as my smallish children squat on all fours to lick the windfall. I watch the flock graze, before I whip out my crook, but a dust buster might be a better choice.


Anonymous said...

I kind of agree with the sweet multivitamin syrup but I find that Omega 3 supplementing is very important. Do you know that this one can improve concentration a great deal? It is alvo very difficult in our western diet to include a suficient quantity of Omega 3 daily, therefore it is important to supplement it. Have you tried it?
Hug x
He is lovely in the photo!

Jeni said...

I love reading various articles replete with tantalizing recipes too that are going to guarantee one's family will lead a great life due to having had a wonderful and very balanced diet. However, two things come to mind when trying to apply some of these diet plans or menus, recipes, into meal planning when there is at least one autistic child in the house. One of these is finances as rarely do these things suggest anything but the highest priced items in the grocery store and I have yet to see a menu planner that takes into consideration the stubborn streaks an autistic child can have with respect to food preferences. In this house, if it includes pasta of some type, usually you can get that much into a small tummy but then too, it best be the specific type of pasta she wants on any given day as well or you may end up either wearing said foods and/or re-mopping the floor after some things get tossed overboard. Every once in a blue moon we manage to bribe a green bean or two into her though.

Ange said...

loved the photo!

For our 10th anniversary, my husband asked me what I wanted...maybe a special piece of jewelry perhaps? I said I wanted him to help me build our garden so that it would be ready for planting next spring. My idea is that it will solve so many problems with nutrition, money, etc.... of course since we are going to do a terraced garden on a hill that we don't no what else to do with, it's going to cost a pretty penny for the retaining wall blocks! ANd I'll probably bomb at growing edible food, so we'll probably end up eating out more. Ugh. In theory...

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