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Monday, October 08, 2007

The Wedding

I peer at the computer screen and the announcement of my brother’s wedding to JP. It will be a duplicate of their Chinese wedding which took place, funnily enough, in China. This time it will be in England. Friday 29the December. Autumn and Winter are busy months in this American household. The children zip back to school just in time for us to bump into Halloween, trip over Thanksgiving, plummet into two December birthdays, tumble into Christmas and hop over New Year. It’s carousel time. We plan to insert another horse.

“So this is the itinerary as I see it,” he announces, as my mind is busy with other things. Perhaps if I buy two suits for them, one size too large, right now and then beat the fabric with rocks, I might just be able to make them soft enough for them to wear in….......two months time?
“Christmas Day is on a Tuesday this year, so we’ll fly on the Wednesday, Boxing Day and land on Thursday.” I wonder if they’ll want her to be a bridesmaid or a flower girl? It’s a civil ceremony so at least we won’t have to be silent and immobile in a church.

“We’ll drive down all day on Thursday from Heathrow. With a bit of luck we’ll arrive at the hotel late Thursday night.”
I should probably get her a new outfit anyway. Where will I find something woolly and warm enough, in California? I may have to buy something myself! Ooo how I hate shopping.
“Then if we can drag them all out of bed the next day, on Friday, just in time, the Wedding is at 1 p.m.”
I should probably start prepping them for the agony of air flight again as soon as possible. Tomorrow would be a good time to start.
“Then they’ll leave on their honeymoon, in the wee small hours, I expect.”
At least we’ll probably get away with only one suitcase, or maybe two if we take our own bedding. I’ll have to find or buy some ordinary warm clothes. England in December can be wicked.
“On Saturday we can drive back and stop off at my parents in Poole and stay the night. Probably only a five hour trip but it will be the New Year weekend, so traffic might be busy.”
I must remember that if I’m wearing woolly tights, I won’t have any shoes that fit. Perhaps I should wear boots, or galoshes hidden under a long skirt?
“Then we’ll drive to the airport the next day. Have to be up early though because of 3 hour check in.”
Should I just pack the present and wrap it on arrival? Otherwise all the paper will be scrunched. Can we stop off somewhere to buy paper? Should I pack the paper here?
“That means that we should be back in SF on Sunday and home later in the afternoon. Almost one complete day devoted to the wedding and all the other days traveling.”
I wonder if we’ll have time to visit some other chums, en route?
“All done and dusted in 5 days!”
“Well……with that many transitions…..it’s probably best to just let all the meltdowns flow back to back, with no wriggle room. A huge 5 day melta-marathon.” I feel slightly nauseous and I’m still on terra firma. I’d better buy an extra large catering carton of ear plugs…..and Goldfish.

Perhaps I should just shove the Goldfish in my ears and have done with it?


Ange said...

We have a walk this weekend and a formal wedding next weekend (my grandmother's). Bubba is the ring bearer. Moosie gets to follow him down (because separating him from his brother would invoke ear piercing screams). I honestly don't know if we will make it through the whole ordeal. At least we aren't traveling (sorry), but the wedding is in a church and the reception is a sit-down formal dinner at a country club. Ahh..I need to get back to pretending like it's not happening. Any ideas for a formal outfit that can handle blood, sweat, and tears... grabby hands, snotty noses, hip carrying a thrasher and dragging a flopper?

Jeni said...

Knowing just how difficult it can be to get an 18-month-old with issues and a four-year-old autistic ready to go to church for a simple service, I cringe at the thoughts of anything more involved than that. The thought of traveling ANY distance, much less trans-Atlantic would really do me in for sure! I read your post and also the comment here and have to confess I was chuckling as I read them because the issues were presented in a manner using some great humor but at the same time, so gut-level honest of all the things one must contend with under all these circumstances with kids who have their own agenda working -usually in overtime too. I don't envy either of you for the coming events but I do envy the way you both write about these things and manage to see and show humor in the face of impending disaster - or what could be that way at any rate. Cross your fingers, pray, and keep smiling, even laughing about it as it does provide a great survival mechanism to kick into gear.

Anonymous said...

the good old days. nice shot. happy ww

Anonymous said...

In the middle of all this...do you get to breath ;-)

Anonymous said...

Sounds like hell. Good luck.

purple_kangaroo said...

I hope it all goes as well as possible.

Anne said...

Sounds like fun!

(Ambien for everyone.)

But then again, my children like to travel.

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