England 2, America Infinity

My son snuggles up close to purr with contentment as our holiday draws to a close. He is still at the ‘part cat’ stage of development but there is no harm in checking whether England has grown in attractiveness after an additional annual exposure.
“So………is there anything else you like about England now?”
“Else?”
“Um……additional…….extra. You like afternoon tea time but is there a number two, a second thing that you like?”
“Well……..”
“Yes?”
“I think maybe I am liking all dah alley’s.”
“Alley’s?”
“Yes…….alley’s is being dah little wiggly roads dat are being too small for proper cars.”
“Ah! Yes indeedy. All those little cobbled streets are rather quaint.”
“Dey are perfect.”
“Really! You surprise me. I thought you liked large, straight and neat.”
“Yes but my cat part like’s alley’s betterer.”

Everything is Bigger and Better in America

Our daily route in our huge hire car on the tiny little roads in England on holiday.






Ooo the excitement!







If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

How to make your own Votive hurricane lantern

Yes, this is not so much a ‘get organized’ post as a ‘have a daily do-able activity for the children’ post.
You will need:-
A jam jar
A tea light
An old wire hanger
Narrow gauge [easy to bend] wire
Wire cutters
Beads or chopped up drinking straws as a substitute and even more 'green' beads.

Thread the beads onto wire and secure each end so they don't fall off.

Cut a length of wire long enough to go all the way around the rim of the jar and make a handle.

Thread the beads onto the long wire first and then secure around the rim and fashion a handle.

Pop the tealight inside and voila. Make sure you hang it in a safe place as is does get very hot which is why a longer handle is better. Hang far away from anything flammable.






Children need a lot of help with this one but motivation is pivotal. The motivation here has nothing to do with making a craft or creating something pretty and function. It's all about the motive, namely, although you may not immediately recognize it, you have just made a 'moth attractor.' Now you may experience the true joy of sitting in the garden in the semi darkness with your moth attractor and children and a great many flying insects, some of which might be moths but I'm sure the majority of them are mosquitoes.

Parents are advised to sit on their hands as swatting "nature's friends" is likely to prove counter productive. The lawyer in me would describe this activity as an "attractive nuisance."

Welcome Home

Hosted by "Tracy" at "Mother May I," but the photo-picture below will whizz you right there with one click.

Just call me snap happy.

This is the first thing we saw when be tried to blunder in the garage door after a 12 hour flight:-
















A big improvement on the tatty old aid memoires, check lists and prompts that are usually on that door.

Sea of Clouds

[or why a significant speech delay is such a nebulous thing]

“I am love.”
“Indeed you are dear! Anything in particular that you find favour with today?”
“Yes,” comes the enthusiastic breathy sharer, “I am love the natures.”
“Which particular part of nature?”
“The Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter “pictures.”

Nesting Jetlag

Get the code:-
Cut and paste
from this little
boxy thing below

<a href="http://www.lighteningonline.com/"><img src="http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q158/mmcewen/smiley-saturday-1.jpg" /></a>

The Nature of things

The Nature of things
As with most things around here, I have no idea where it came from, but now it’s here, it provides a whole heap of motivation as well as no end of hic-cups for inattentive parents. For some children, the ability to communicate verbally ebbs and flows, with backlogs and blockages, but sometimes we drown in an unexpected flood.
“Agh!”
“What? Are you o.k.? What’s the matter dear?”
My son fizzes and hops around the kitchen on stiff stick legs and springy toes as the words percolate up from the depths.
“No!”
“No what?”
“Don’t!”
“Don’t what?”
“Agh!”
“!”
“Don’t touch my nature!”
“Where is your nature……..what is……..your nature?”
“Agh!”
He thrusts out a helpful pointy arm to assist me but as he is also spinning in a circle I fail to nail down the point of interest.
“Er….?”
He stops dead to turn his entire body into an arrow where his nose directs attention to the counter top and an overturned glass that covers a pebble.
“Ah…….it’s a pebble……..how…….nice.”
“No! It is being my nature. She is being my friend.”
“You have a pebble for a friend……..how lovely.”
“NO!”
He gingerly lifts away the glass and peers closely at the pet rock, nudges it gently with his forefinger, “Agh! She is goned!”
“Who is goned…..gone?”
“My friend is lost!”
“Ah…..some kind of insect perhaps?”
“Yes. My rolly polly friend.”
“Ah……she rolled away I suspect.”
“Do not be laugh at my nature friend.”
“Sorry…….I…..”
“You are bad to laugh at nature.”
“Yes….sorry……lets look under the rock shall we?”
The rolly polly is revealed in all it’s glorious magnificence for my son to ooo and ahh over with tender gentle words of adoration. He stops, silent and grasps my wrist between his teeth, the same as a crocodile carries her young. We experience a rare instance of direct eye contact before he releases me.
“Itsa rule!”
“What is?”
“Itsa like the laws of physics.”
“What is like the laws of physics?”
“Be kind to mother nature’s creatures……..or she’ll bite you in the butt.”

I like to think that my own performance might have been better, had it not been 3 in the morning, but I suspect that the jet lag excuse may be running a bit thin.

The Fleshpots of England

Maybe people have super-sized themselves during the last year or more probably, there has been a gradual expansion in girth over the past decade whilst I have been distracted by other things.

I am uncertain if people are really larger or whether fashion changes have meant that our bodies are more exposed as clothing becomes ever more skippy and close fitting. Whatever the reason, my son observes over a number of days. We are at the coast where holiday makers are prone to wear holiday clothes and swimsuits, very small ones. I notice him looking without comment. Eventually, after much thought he sees fit to share his opinion with me.
“Mom!”
“Yes dear?”
“Dah peoples in England………”
“Yes…….?”
“Dah peoples in England are………”
“Yes?”
“Dah peoples in England are very…..skin……skin……..skinny.”
I’m sure it was very welcome news to everyone within a five mile radius at 50 decibels.

Curiously the boys were not in the least fazed by the numerous topless sunbathers however my daughter, being in the pre-teen stage of delicacy, was thoroughly mortified.



If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

Happy Holidays [19]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-













Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [18]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-











Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [17]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-










Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [16]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-









Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [15]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-







Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [14]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-





Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holiday [13]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-




























Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [12]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-


























Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy holidays [11]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-
























Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [10]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-























Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [9]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-





















Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [8]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-



















Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [7]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-


















Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [6]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-
















Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [5]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-















Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [4]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-













Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy Holidays [3]

We are still in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-












Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Holiday [2]

We are in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-









Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."
Cheers dears

Happy holidays [1]

We are in England.

Meanwhile I have a few scribbles from yesteryear, very tame, to tide you over.

Double click for larger view:-







Alternatively, these are a few posts from a while back re-posted.

1. Who's afraid of the "Big Bad Wolf"
2. It's a "dog's Life."
3. "Street Talk."
4. "International Translations."

5. "The Sleeping Life."
6. "The difference between sarcasm and Irony."
7. "Eat your Words."
8. "Spoonfeeding."
9. "Old Fogies."
10. "Her Royal Hightness."
11. "A right Dog's Breakfast."
12. "How to insult someone in a foreign language."
13. "Notable Quote."

14. "Literal Minded."

Cheers dears

Onesies, Twosies and Threesies

Now let me just point out that I am not really complaining. However, laundry, amongst a few other things, is the bane of my life. It’s not the laundry as such now I come to think of it, as much as the sheer quantity. My mother, bless her cotton socks, would frequently point out that every parent has to do a great deal of laundry. More importantly, where was all the laundry coming from since most of the time they were undressed? Clothing, or lack thereof, has been an on-going campaign since day one.

My little darlings were first dressed in the most adorable of little onesies, or ‘worm suits’ as we referred to them. I particularly liked the ones with feet, mittens and hoods, or I did initially. I went off the ones with feet, mittens and hoods when I discovered that children grow. A yard of bare leg seemed socially acceptable but a baby in a skin tight, overstretched ski suit, was not. And they kept doing it of course, growing, that is to say.

Fortunately, each additional child wore their previous sibling’s outfits. I believe that Meyer Lemon was my favourite colour for approximately five years. “Is it going to be a boy or a girl?” people would ask as they admired my pregnancy bump with a knob protruding, dead centre.

Now, oh so many years later, with oh so many more bodies to cater for, I am somewhat surprised to find my son in his bedroom dressing, voluntarily. Whilst his choices would not be mine, I always think it is a good idea for children to express their individuality. I watch as he pulls on another T-shirt.
“Why are you wearing two shirts dear? Is the air conditioning too much for you this time of year?”
“No.”
“Then why are you wearing two?”
“I’m not.”
“You…….” I watch as he pulls on yet another T-shirt. “Why are you wearing three shirts dear?” But I speak too soon as he reaches for a second pair of shorts to put on over the ones he is already wearing.
“O.k…….what’s with all the clothes all of a sudden?”
“Well…….John wears three shirts at school.”
“Oh right cool John wears three shirts so you’re going to be just like him. Cool!”
“No. I’m gonna be different…….two shorts…….cooler!”
If only it were that easy.

Feminism – the new order

I cook in the kitchen, but I just can’t help my ear from nipping round the corner, just to check.


“Girls!” he says with the breathy tone of mischief.
“Girls? What girls? Why didya say girls?”
“Girls…..are recyclable.”
“Whatcha mean? Recyclable?”
“Girls………you can use em again and again and again.”
“Yuck! What are you talking about you little ole dipstick. Mom he’s bein disgustin……again……I think.”
“I not being disgustin. I am being Mother Nature’s friend.”
“Yuck. Mom I think that sex education class teacher shouldn’t teach him nothin else!”
“No. I am been good to be green.”
“Green? Whatcha talking about now?”
“I am being saying that girls are green.”
“Shut up why dontcha.”
“No……girls are green because they recycle with their babies. They make themselves again and again and again with their babies. Ultimate recycling.”

One heck of a Muffin!

If you enjoy caption competitions and photographs, you may wish to nip along to"DJ Kirkby" over at "Chez Aspie" and test your brain power.

How to make a Luigi cake topper decoration

You may not need this right now if you have little ones but this is a mere glimpse into the future.

You will need several tonnes of white fondant / sugarpaste or ready coloured packs available from Wilton. Start the project several weeks ahead of time to allow the figurine to dry thoroughly.

Start with the head, roll until smooth and mount on a stick.




Add features and details.






Shape body torso and hands / gloves.



Roll out lower body and divide into legs.



Mould the shoes.



Add each additional part with sugar glue [take a small amount of white fondant and add a few drops of boiled water until the required consistency is achieved.


Leave figure out of direct sunlight to dry, preferably hidden to maintain the surprise factor.





Pop on the cake, light the candles, step back and admire the view of unencumbered freefall delight.








Why bother? Because sometimes speechless really is priceless.